Control Freak

Making a member of your family do what you want will never really get you want you want. Why? Because compliance doesn't produce closeness.  When we force others to comply to our needs/wants through abuse, fear, or withdrawal, we won't get love in return because comes from a free choice.

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On their wedding day, no one says "I can't wait till he/she feels like a stranger to me." Everyone is filled with the hope that this person they are marrying will make them feel loved and connected forever.  When considering having kids, no couple says "I can't wait till our kids grow up and have nothing to do with us."  Deep down we want closeness, intimacy, connection so much that sometimes we force it.  We try to control others to give it to us.

Consider the incredible moment of Jesus sacrificing Himself for all people.  That moment was the most purest love that exists.  It was God's love on display.  It's important to note that this also was a moment of complete relinquishing of control. Jesus trusted God, and let His will happen His way.  This event also closed the massive gap that sin made between man and God.  Loving in a way that surrendered control brought about such intimacy that we are now called children of God.

You deeply want closeness from your parent, spouse, child, or sibling.  Don't make the mistake of manipulating them and expect to receive.  Forcing their compliance will actually push them further way.  Surrender control and let God's love bring the intimacy you so desire.  

What does your future family look like?  You will have a future family mesh if you love well.  You will have a mess if you control.  Today you can hope for better.